#WhyIDidntReport

My #WhyIDidntReport story is a bit different, but just as important, I hope.

I was 18, a college freshman and away from home and on my own. I was also a virgin. Not because I didn’t like sex, but because I grew up in a very strict family, and it didn’t seem worth the ire of my parents to get involved with a guy.

So I was in a co-ed dorm, with 5 floors f women on top, and 5 floors of men below. I was on lucky number 7.

College life was full of parties, games of quarters (think beer pong), social time. I studied hard, and played hard.

I hadn’t found anyone special, but I had my eye on a certain junior that made me swoon. He was some HOT chocolate.

One Saturday night, a game of quarters was happening on a men’s floor. I knew some people, some were strangers, and my crush was there.

I drank, then drank some more. My guy had to leave for some reason lost to time. After a short time, I decided to leave as well. I headed to the elevator. A guy followed me, saying that he would make sure I got inside okay. I told him I was fine and would see myself up the elevator. We were in the foyer of the elevator area, and I didn’t want him to take me to my room. I told him it was past curfew of when men and women weren’t allowed on each others’ floors, but he kept insisting that he would see me “home”. Drunk as I was, I knew that it wasn’t good, alarm bells were ringing, no one else was around.

I looked around and saw the stairwell.

“Nevermind”, I called out and ran to the stairs. I slammed into the bar and the door flung open. I ran to the stairs and quickly decided that I couldn’t run UP the stairs in my condition. So down I headed, into the men’s domain. I heard the footsteps behind me and knew that he followed. I went down one flight, and could hear him. I ran down another flight and could still hear his footsteps.

I flung open the stairwell door and ran into the men’s hall. I began to bang on every door I got to. A quick bang bang and I would move on. I knew he would be in the hallway soon, but I dared not look back. Behind me I heard a dorm room door open and I turned. A guy poked his head out, and just beyond, I could see my pursuer. “What’s going on”, he asked. My pursuer stopped and ran back into the stairwell.

I didn’t know their names. I could not have picked them out of a line-up, at least not now. Back then, I don’t know.

I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t report. Because “nothing” happened. I wasn’t actually assaulted. I don’t know what he would have done to me if he had caught me, but I know in my soul that it would not have been good. He was NOT concerned about my well-being. I was lucky. I got away BEFORE the attack. But I never told anyone, until last night when I told my husband.

Because “nothing” happened to me.

#WhyIDidntReport

2 thoughts on “#WhyIDidntReport”

  1. Something happened. It was scary, unwelcome and damaged your sense of self. Fortunately it wasn’t rape but it wasn’t good either! You did nothing wrong. In fact in spite of your inebriation you were smart to knock on a lot of doors. No one should have to ever fear for themselves!

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